“I’d rather be honest and authentic and disappoint some people than to exhaust myself trying to keep up the façade of perfection.” – Crystal Paine
Have you ever pondered the question what is a normal life? It’s a question that requires you being completely honest with yourself.
I sure have. I feel like I’ve been searching for it most of my life, and yet it always seems to escape me. I look at other people around me and their lives seem so, well, normal. Yes, they have struggles.
But overwhelmingly their lives seem void of the pitfalls and disappointments I always seem to find myself plagued with.
I’ve been doing this a long time. Living that is, or struggling to make the best out of what I’ve been given. It’s been four decades now, and I’ve gotta tell you, the effort is daunting.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve definitely shared some amazing experiences with some amazing people in that time.
But their longevity is short-lived at best. Maybe that has something to do with me and my lofty expectations of the world around me.
Maybe I have an unrealistic outlook on what the human race is truly capable of, which leads me down one disappointing road after another. Maybe I’m not being honest with myself and those around me.
So, I guess some of that lack of longevity is entirely my own fault. I certainly can’t prophesize about what everyone else is doing wrong, without accepting some of the responsibility myself.
Being honest with yourself
We are all in control of our actions. We all have the ability to look in the mirror and recognize the person we are to the people around us. Some of us are more self-aware and can often course correct the relationships we consider valuable to us.
But looking in the mirror is no easy task. Oftentimes we’re incredibly self-deceptive – convincing ourselves that our behaviors and actions are not only warranted, but perfectly acceptable.
I’m realizing that a journey towards normal is subjective, but is achievable. It’s takes a great deal of courage, persistence, and most of all, honesty in order to come to fruition.
Honest with yourself and those around you.
Famous relationship consultant Barbara De Angelis says, “Living with integrity means: Not settling for less than what you know you deserve in your relationships. Asking for what you want and need from others. Speaking your truth, even though it might create conflict or tension. Behaving in ways that are in harmony with your personal values. Making choices based on what you believe, and not what others believe.”
It’s the only way you’ll ever find an end on your journey towards normal.